I love when people try to justify double-parking

"sm70- why not Duesenberg?" (sm70-whynotduesenberg)
10/17/2018 at 13:59 • Filed to: None

I’m an admin on a local carspotting Facebook page, which means I’m constantly getting sent pictures of fancy cars in my area -and as you may have seen, taking some of my own. On Saturday, I found a neat grey 2002 Dodge Viper RT/10 double-parked outside a Twin Peaks.

Later that day, I had two more people submit pictures of the same Viper, at two different locations, still double parked:

We pretty much always call people out for parking like this, especially for the habitual offenders (believe me, there are several cars known to the group which always park like this. Inevitably, there will always be a few people who will pipe up with “If I owned a car that nice I’d double park too! Can’t have door dings!” Often, they (or even the owner of the car) will accuse those who complain about the parking of being “haters”, “losers”,”poor” and other creative insults usually reserved for use by the president.

If you are genuinely that worried about getting a door ding, park further away.

Sometimes, people will point out that the double parked car is parked far away, so it isn’t really hurting anything. Although this may be true, if the car is already parked far away, that should pretty much eliminate the chance of door dings. Furthermore, any double parked car, especially a flashy one, regardless of how far away it is, is more likely to attract petty people who will deliberately screw with the car. If you are truly worried about your car and not just trying to show off like a douche, park your car as far away as possible in a single space. If that’s not possible, just park in a single space in the safest place you can. People may be careless ordinarily, but they’re more likely to retaliate against a double-parked car, especially in a crowded lot.

Parking normally puts you at a risk of door dings. Parking in two spaces risks having your car vandalized, ticketed, towed, booted, or internet-shamed. Parking far away, while still only using one space, poses the fewest risks. It’s that simple.

DISCUSSION (50)

dogisbadob > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:01

motorcycles and smart cars :o)

Chuckles > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:04

It's just a car. If you're going to drive it around town, follow the rules. It's not special.

Spanfeller is a twat > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:05

I mean. If I took the extra effort to park far away and also not fuck with people, why should you park like a dick at the front?

There’s no excuse/

CB > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:06

“I double park to avoid door dings! But I also drive around on the road where I drive over potholes, risk rock chips, and could potentially get in an accident! But door dings! ” -Double Parkers

WilliamsSW > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:08

A Viper. Double parked. First outside a Twin Peaks, then outside of a tanning spa.

It’s *possible* that the owner of this car is a complete douche bro. Maybe.

Urambo Tauro > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:11

Another problem with the defense of “trying to avoid door dings” is the assumption that everyone else around you is going to stay in the lines . Not that that’s an unreasonable thing to expect, but you lose your right to expect it from others once you allow yourself to break that rule.

BigBlock440 > WilliamsSW
10/17/2018 at 14:12

Maybe he just wanted pizza

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > WilliamsSW
10/17/2018 at 14:13

Yeah I saw it pull up, it was two twenty-or thirtysomething bros.

Verdog ~ manual Bro, Bro - HellHawk Equipped > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:15

FNGS OUT Brah!

WilliamsSW > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:19

Kinja'd!!!

fintail > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:23

I wonder if I could squeeze the fintail in between the Altima and the Viper. Just try giving that thing a ding.

The “poor” reply is amusing too, yeah, all of the tycoons I know drive 16 year old Vipers. Neat car, but these are attainable for many normal people, doesn’t really stoke jealousy in me anyway.

LimitedTimeOnly @ opposite-lock.com > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:26

OK, so a sincere question: Should this really be called “double parking?”

For me, double parking is parking a car so that it blocks in an already parked car, with the typical example being on a city street with parallel parking, where the double parking occurs in the travel lane next to parked cars.

I guess I would call the pictured behavior “taking two spaces.”

If only answering this question were my biggest problem in life . . . but I’m curious anyway.

DipodomysDeserti > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:29

Douche move, but I find people double parking equally as offensive as people complaining about double parking.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > fintail
10/17/2018 at 14:33

I don’t think that particular argument was used for this particular car. But yeah with a Huruacan or 720s people will sometimes be like “You’re just too broke to know what to do with nice things and it made you bitter”

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > LimitedTimeOnly @ opposite-lock.com
10/17/2018 at 14:34

I call both of those things “double parking” but I see your point.

WilliamsSW > BigBlock440
10/17/2018 at 14:34

Maybe he got a spray tan AND a pizza

SPAMBot - Horse Doctor > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:35

I never double park in the Ferrari. I am very strategic about my spot, but sometimes there is nothing you can do. There is a risk of damage while driving, while parking, and even while the car is at home in the garage. Door dings, rock chips, scraping the nose, getting T-boned, falling boxes and ladders, etc. are possibilities. At some point you have to stop worrying and just enjoy the damn car. Parking and leaving is still a little stressful for me, but I’m getting better haha

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > DipodomysDeserti
10/17/2018 at 14:38

Color me shocked

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > SPAMBot - Horse Doctor
10/17/2018 at 14:39

You speak the truth.

My bird IS the word > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:39

Double park in the back of the lot? Ok. Double park in the front?= douchebag.

Get off your fat retired ass and get your steps in.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > My bird IS the word
10/17/2018 at 14:41

I’ll agree that double parking in the back of the lot probably isn’t hur ting anything, but what’s the point?

fintail > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:42

Those airing such views probably received most or all of their toys via parental largesse, or think they are next in line to strike it rich so they will jump to defense (socio- economic mobility trends virtually guarantee they won’t strike it rich) .

When I see one of those cars (plenty here too), I simply wonder what kind of trust fund covered it, what kind of dreary finance/tech Walter Mitty type drives it, or what dirty offshore money bought its way in to buy it. Not sure if there’s much to be jealous about for any of them.

E92M3 > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:46

I got no issues with it as lo ng as they don’t do it near the en trance AND the lot is never full.

ttyymmnn > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:51

When they double park in front of a store, I like to park right next to them anyway. Far side of the lot? I’m okay with that.

ttyymmnn > LimitedTimeOnly @ opposite-lock.com
10/17/2018 at 14:52

I think you’re right. Double parking is technically parking next to a car that is parked on the curb, thus blocking a lane of travel.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > E92M3
10/17/2018 at 14:57

Right but then what’s the point?

Sovande > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 14:58

Jesus. You really care how other people park. Like a lot.

Cash Rewards > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 15:00

When I had my mini, I would purposely park in one of the spots anytime I could. Made me so damn happy.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Sovande
10/17/2018 at 15:02

It just gets my goat to see poeple who think they’re exempt from the rules because they drive a nicer car.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 15:06

Hey now, let’s not make this a color thing.

Ash78, voting early and often > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 15:09

I don’t advocate violence at all, especially the random kind.

But IMHO, it’s hard to find a profile on someone who needs a good asskicking more than a guy in a Viper parked outside of Twin Peaks.

Too bad it’s a Federal Crime to assault the President.

Gerry197 > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 15:09

I don’t care about double parkers near the back side with a moderate or near empty parking lot.

Who cars at that point, but near the front or a packed lot during the holidays, that different.

nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 15:12

Cause people like me like to park in the back regardless. I'll park near them so their car doesn't feel lonely.

My bird IS the word > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 15:23

I’ll still have people park right next to me even when every other space is open. It drives me crazy. although, I don’t drive that nice of a car.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > CB
10/17/2018 at 16:05

All of those except one are unavoidable risks that must be taken if you are to drive anywhere . The exception, door dings, is the result of someone not being careful not to damage someone else’s property.

It’s not odd that one is more infuriating than the others.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 16:12

Like most things, my response is a resounding “meh”. See also “it’s not a problem until it’s a problem”, and “do what you want until it interfere s with me”.

I get it. I probably wouldn’t park like that, but meh. I get it. On top of that, I’m actually more comfortable with a double parked vehicle like the Viper in the unpopulated area of the lot than a properly parked Viper in the crowded section, on the basis of long doors and a harder vehicle to get in and out of means a higher chance of receiving door dings FROM the Viper rather than the other way around.

Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer > fintail
10/17/2018 at 16:16

At the same time, most “normal people” probably don’t realize that they are priced within reach and just see a douche. Which is probably an unfair assessment of the driver, but it seems to be the image Vipers (and many other cars of the type) have cultivated.

Sovande > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 16:16

Clearly

Nauraushaun > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 16:27

This is true

Nauraushaun > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 16:27

GETS MY GOAT?!

fintail > Smallbear wants a modern Syclone, local Maple Leafs spammer
10/17/2018 at 16:52

True, it is amusing what some people think ordinary MBs and BMWs cost. S ome of the bad image is behavior-based. If one doesn’t want to be seen as a dbag, don’t drive/park/(or react to criticism) like one.

In these days of a growing wealth divide, driving something too flashy opens a person up to be judged. Drive it and park it like a jerk, and they ask for it.

GoodIdeaAtTheTime > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 17:56

If the parking lot is fairly empty and they are not in a handicap or loading area , honestly I could care less. But when the lot is packed and I am searching for a spot for 15 minutes and am now 10 minutes late for my wife’s chemo treatment, I get a little salty. And profane. Well, lots of profane. Sometimes belligerent . Honestly, things happen. Accidentally. Yeah.

sm70- why not Duesenberg? > Nauraushaun
10/17/2018 at 18:46

Rustles my jimmi lets.

E92M3 > My bird IS the word
10/17/2018 at 19:00

Often the ones circling the lot looking for the closest spot, are wearing workout clothes . Like they go to the gym, but can ’t be both ered to walk an extra 50ft.

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 19:09

Double parking is okay if you’re doing it at the back of the lot.

But the guy in the first pic is an asshole and is begging for someone to park their cheap beater car really close next to it.

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 19:09

That’s not your goat, that’s my goat!!!

YOU STOLE MY GOAT!

Manwich - now Keto-Friendly > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/17/2018 at 19:11

I like to park my cheap beater next to expensive/prestigious cars to make my car ‘better’. It causes some of the ‘prestige air’ to rub off on my car.

My bird IS the word > E92M3
10/17/2018 at 21:19

It’s because they wan’t to be seen as active, not actually put in the work to be active.

E92M3 > My bird IS the word
10/18/2018 at 09:01

“I’m paying a lot for my personal trainer, hang on.. I think the dog walker is at the door”.

atfsgeoff > sm70- why not Duesenberg?
10/20/2018 at 00:26

Can confirm, I happily park my already-dented and dinged truck a few inches away from the driver side of double parking dickheads like this.